In this episode, we are talking about the concept, It's Not Always Literal. And when you understand this, you will give yourself permission to go after so much more with so much less criticism of the results. You ready? Let's do it. Hello, you are listening to The Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. I'm Kelli Youngman and I am the Life Coach for Performers. I help actors, singers, and dancers love themselves and their lives way more so keep listening to learn how you can love your life, both on and off the stage. Hello and welcome back to the podcast. This is episode 101, and I wanna say this out loud because again, your girl took a little bit of an unintentional pause, but I have to start acknowledging that these pauses are intentional. And if I zoom out, I can see so clearly that I've been in a portal. I've been remaking some decisions that didn't necessarily need to be remade, and at the same time, the fact that I was thinking so deeply, I feel like we just have to sometimes embrace that our own timing is perfect and beautiful and unique, and I wouldn't go back and change it. Because the truth is when I hit 100 episodes of Love Your Life as a Performer, what I knew so deeply is that my next iteration, my next identity, my next quantum leap is here. And it's been a little un uncomfy. I think I've shared this and maybe I even shared it on the podcast, but I, you know, was at lunch with one of my clients and friends and we were just talking about this next season. And what I felt so deeply is that even though I wasn't quite clear yet, I could feel that it was big. And let me tell you, the shit is huge and it has caused me to slow down and to give myself permission to change my mind and to explore what that looks like. And of course, as I've said before, and I will say again, I know that there are changes coming to my business, to my name, my branding, my identity, however you want to think about the container that holds our identity, our personality, and is informing all of our personal reality. And so again, I just wanna say hello. Hi, how are you? I know it's been a couple of weeks and believe me, you are gonna be so glad I took that time to integrate into what is coming next. I want to use this episode to talk about the concept that it's not literal, and if you've been following along and catching all the little things, you will know that last week I did a little bit of I don't know what you wanna call it, a, it was a download, it was like a flash of lightning, and it came through me so freaking clearly. And so I wanna share the story of this magic because again, as I've been in this season of transition, the outcome was not what I anticipated, but the exercise of engaging with it fully changed who I am forever. And it honestly changed my understanding and the depth of my marriage in such a beautiful, clear fucking way. That, again, I just wanna put this on the record because I tell my clients all of the time, it's not literal. It's not always literal. And what I mean by that is that. When you are taking action, when you are engaging with a new challenge, a new goal, just something different that you're bringing into reality, we wanna be engaging with it with our whole ass. Not like half of it, but like really showing up so deeply. So I know I've said this example before, and if it's a repetition, just hear it again with new ears. But right now I'm sitting in a chair recording this podcast and I could tell myself, okay, I'm gonna stand up. All right, I'm gonna stand up. I know what it's like to stand up. I've been sitting for a while. I'm gonna stand up. I could say that over and over and over and over again to myself, and I can visualize it, and I can believe in it, but until I decide to stand up, my ass is not getting out of this chair. Okay? I want you to think about that in the potency and in the energy of how committed you are right now to changing your results. Okay? And what I mean by it's not literal, and you'll see this in the demonstration of the story I'm about to tell, but what I mean by it's not literal, is that we aren't doing things only to get something specific. Even though of course in our minds, we're creating and we're attaching to an ideal outcome, and we wanna create belief in that outcome because of course, the belief, the emotion, the excitement, that is what fuels our inspired action. But if we're constantly thinking it's literal, like I'm going to this audition to book my Broadway debut in this show, and I'm locked into that and I'm saying, it must be this and only this. In those moments, we're closing ourselves off to the exponential magic that is being set in motion by our desire. Right. This is where it comes into it's this or something better. It's this or something better. And again, if we are committed to the result, I'm making my Broadway debut, whether it's this show or the next, right? We can be available for the transformation from every single audition. And whether you're a performer or not, I want you to think about how that is true for you when you are committed to the result. Maybe it's a six figure business. Maybe it's raising your rates to 10K. Maybe it is, you know, going on that dream trip or renovating your floors or renovating your kitchen, whatever it is that lights you up. It's engaging with that desire, knowing it's coming and knowing that every single thing. That you receive, that you download, that you take action on is moving you closer to the identity of the person who has and experiences the life that you desire. Okay? So it's not always literal. It's not always about getting what you want right now in this tangible moment and knowing and understanding, and celebrating that every single thing is bringing you closer to who you're gonna be. Even when that looks like air quote failure, even when that looks like you didn't get what you wanted, even when you know it doesn't turn out as you planned. And so with that in mind, I wanna just speak to the fact that if you were paying attention last week, I put out this lightning offer and it was something that literally dropped down to me mid blow job and I shared it as such on my social media. And it was this incredible rush of like, this is coming to me and I'm gonna honor it. Okay. Again, I want you to be listening to this for you. Where in your life do you get like that stroke of inspiration and take action on it? This has been one of my superpowers and again, it is interesting because the breakthrough that this facilitated showed me so much in so many different ways, but really truly it came to me and I became the person that went from I'm gonna create$15,000 in three days to, I'm gonna create 15K in one day. And I just started engaging with myself with what would be possible to create this? And if I was so certain it was happening, how would I be thinking, moving feeling? Again, remember, I can't stand up. I can't get my ass out of this chair until I decide I'm getting my ass out of the chair. So what was so fun about that is just even in the verbiage and the language, I watched myself give. Like, I don't know, maybe I gave like a 0.5 of a fuck for a second, but I was like, oh, you know, this might be uncomfortable to say this so boldly, so audaciously. You know, at first I was kind of like tiptoeing around it. Like this came from intimacy and I was like, no, I was giving my man some love and it came to me. What was so fun about this too, is when I posted this, there was the part of me, the Catholic school girl that was like, oh my God, you can't say that out loud. And I was like, well, wait a second. I stand by pleasure. I stand by enjoying pleasure. I stand by living from pleasure. Why would I not be... I don't know. I don't even wanna say air quote, courageous. Why wouldn't I be direct in sharing this? Because my best people are constantly looking for permission slips to be themselves, to be bold, to say the real thing, the truth with love. And the amount of women that reached out to me and were like, oh my gosh, that's when I get my best ideas. That's when I receive choreography or that's when you know, great ideas come to me too. Again, what I realized was I was just being a giant light for what I stand for. So the people that were turned off by that message, were gonna see their way out of my reality. But then I'm really dancing with the people who want to be alive, that wanna be available for their sexuality, that know there's no shame in owning that, right? Whether it's with a man, woman, a non-binary human, sexuality and pleasure is part of our human experience. I'm not gonna shy away from that. And so part of what really lit me the fuck up was I was like, okay, there's a Joe Dispenza workshop happening right now, and I'm about to do this. I'm about to create it. And I went all in and I posted about it. I told people about it, I shared it, and it was sort of like this, I don't know, flash deal. And we're gonna get to that in a second too, because there are some things that were out of alignment, but that I couldn't see until after the fact. Right. But we have to be willing to do it to get the value, to get the gold of learning from it. Because again, I can know things intellectually, but I don't know them until I've been through it, right? We can know something in theory, but to know it from lived experience is something different. So I went all in. I was thinking about how would I do this full out if I knew someone was joining me, if I knew someone wanted to pay me? And I really went through so many discoveries of being a coach, being a business owner, being a powerful human. And what I saw in myself was again, that full commitment. I wasn't stressed. I was really relaxed. I was enjoying meditation. I was walking along the pier. I was thinking about powerful women who wanted to say yes to their lives. And it was the first time in a while that I had engaged with my offer from a place of power. Where I knew that what I was offering was so freaking good that it was gonna change lives in a way that I was not afraid of offering high ticket coaching. And I can see that somewhere along the line, I started dimming the potency of what I offer. I started fearing what people were gonna think about me. And you know what my pricing was saying to the world. And again, I can know in theory that what I'm offering is powerful and potent, but what I didn't know is that I wasn't moving from the confidence that I embody in my everyday life. And so I want you to really hear this. We can be confident, strong, capable women, and we can still be moving from lack of confidence. And there's nothing wrong with that except for the fact that we wanna become available to it. Okay? So again, this is what I mean by it's not literal because I put this wild offer out into the world. But what I did practice believing was that someone was gonna take me up on it. And I believed that all the way through until 7:00 AM the next morning, and honestly, I'm still believing it right freaking now because it stretched my belief in what's possible. It changed my relationship to my pricing. It really cemented in the fact that my husband and I are on the same team because, let me tell you this, we didn't just like say, oh yeah, we're doing it. We're going. We acted as if, and I enrolled my husband in this too. Okay. The night before where, you know, air quote, supposed to leave for Joe Dispenza retreat the next day, we packed our suitcases. I was like, baby, I know this might sound crazy, but in the event that I really do manifest this, in the event that someone takes every action to get in on this offer, that is fucking bananas... I basically doubled my offer, and we'll get to this in a second because again, it was illuminating, but I basically doubled my offer and I said, instead of 15K for six months, you're gonna get a year mentorship. You're gonna get two VIP days. It's pay in full today. And I was like, I really believe that someone out there wants this offer, like I had set up every single piece of the email so that if someone responded that they could pay in full with a link. I had set up the email to, you know, receive it, to auto reply back to give them the email link. And I watched my brain over and over say, well, who the hell would pay$15,000 without talking to me? Who would this, that the other? And every time my brain offered me an out, I did not take it. Like I'm talking about like even the logistics of like at first my auto response email was going to spam. And I had to like go online and figure out how to do the, what's it called, like the backend stuff to increase my deliverability. I'm talking, I did every single step as if it was happening, and then including having my husband pack suitcases so that if and when the payment came in, we could go. We packed our bags, everything, and we were in the belief and the excitement of this is happening. Okay, so fast forward to the next morning. I realized that someone has not taken me up on this offer. I don't magically have$15,000 sitting in my account, but what I do have is an expanded nervous system. I have the belief that I could easily make$15,000 in a day, and I was even stretching myself to believe that I could have a$30K day. That I could have someone say yes, and multiple people wanna say yes to this offer, right? So I wasn't just grounding myself into possibility. I wasn't in a waiting, hoping, wishing phase. I was in the embodiment of when I decide something and when I move with certainty, things can happen, right? I expanded my belief to know that I actually can make$30,000 in a day. Easily, right? I showed myself that when my husband and I enroll in a vision together, we have the capacity to say yes, we have the capacity to pack our bags and believe in doing anything and everything that we want, for the rest of our lives. We were thinking about and talking about it after of like how cool to see that if we just decided on a whim, like, Hey, let's go spend the week in Europe. Let's go fly to Italy for the week. That we give ourselves permission to clear our calendars, to make time, to pack our bags, and to know that the most responsible thing we can do is follow our belief. Because again, it's so easy to think that this is delusional or this is wild or crazy, when in actuality, believing in the things that you wanna create is the most responsible thing you could do. The other thing that happened was I wasn't disappointed. I didn't look at the efforts that I put in and I didn't think, oh my God, you're so like cringe for trying to do this. Like you're so stupid for thinking you could manifest$15,000 a day. Like that also didn't cross my mind. I was just in a space where I was celebrating that I've become the kind of person that has an idea and takes action. And again, even though it wasn't literal, I didn't sign a client in that moment, what it did show me was all the places I was lacking belief, all the places I wasn't standing in power and potency of my offer. And how I've been slowly stepping into embodying belief in my offer, instead of really knowing that the reason the price keeps going up is because I'm dancing with people that are highly invested in who they're becoming, and that when I honor the energetic input and the frequency of the magic we're creating, someone else gets to meet me there. If I'm not embodying or leading by example, by trusting and knowing that what I'm putting out is that freaking good, of course there's gonna be a gap in results. But I'm not here to play small. I'm here to dance with the people who wanna freaking go, and my people know that. And anytime I'm not standing in that strength, I'm doing a disservice to everyone by not believing and embodying that$15,000 is not a lot of money. It's significant. And believe me, it is significant, but it's not a lot. And my people wanna know that they can make$15,000 in a day too, right? So I have to be willing to go first. And so again, the outcome wasn't literal, but also some learning that came on the other side is I was still believing, subconsciously, unconsciously, by doubling my offer... it showed me that I was still in a place where I was thinking that I needed to add more to make it more desirable, to make it more. Than knowing that just six months of coaching is transformational. It changes lives, and that the people who step in know that, right. It showed me where I was still sort of waiting. I was in this place of like, okay, I'll make money someday, or I'll make offers someday, but I wasn't in the now. And on top of that, it also honestly sent me into a really amazing, beautiful space with my money, because I do tend to be someone who can jump quickly and act quickly and make decisions quickly. I'm not afraid to invest money. I've invested so many times when I didn't have it, and it's how I've grown my business and my belief to where it is now. But it also showed me a new level of maturity. With my own money making and with my desires and my money management that again, is not about waiting... because believe me, I have even bigger goals now with my money and, I can still be the person that's willing to save for it. I can be the person who creates the money first, and I can break the habit of thinking that every investment has to be, do or die. Because in the beginning of my business, that really served me having the courage to go all in to invest$25,000 in myself over and over again to hire coaches.... one time I hired a coach for$20,000 for a four month container that we didn't even speak. We messaged each other on, I think it was like Facebook Messenger, and I said yes to a$20,000 coaching package, before I had even like spoken with her, right? Like I've done crazy ass shit and it's gotten me to where I am now. And now I also get to show myself I can make investments and I can be the person who has the money first, right? So again, I want you to be listening to this for you to find your growth, to find your edge. Because maybe you are the person who has to be willing to trust and know that when you invest, it's coming back. Because remember, it's not this or that. It's this and this. But when you know it's not literal, when you're not disappointed by the outcome, but you see, and you're reinvigorated by what you've learned from every scenario, that's where the gold is, and that's how you change and that's how you evolve and that's how you become someone different in the process. So again, I did not create$15,000 in three days. I didn't create the$15,000 in 24 hours, but who I became by going all in on committing to that goal, to packing my bags, to being willing to hold belief until the next day and continue to hold belief is what is moving me towards the life I want unapologetically. And if that is what you are looking for, it is time to leap, and I wanna remind you that it's safe to do it. Right now I do have private coaching spots available, and if you want to apply to get in on this juiciness, go to Kelliyoungman singh.com/launch. Because I promise you this is a different kind of life when you're moving with your whole ass and all ships are gonna rise with the tide, so come along. And just know that changes are coming, identities are changing and shifting and expanding. And I am no longer the woman I was a week ago, or even a day ago. And I want that certainty for you to know that every day you are changing. Every day, every way you are getting better and better. Not to prove something, but to be in the excitement of what else is possible. So yes. The podcast is changing. The frequency has changed, the energetic output is different, and that signature essence of Kelli Singh is coming. So stay tuned. Enjoy the view and get in on the magic. I will talk to you soon. Mwah. Hey, I wanna invite you to get started. Because if this is blowing your mind, imagine the impact of when we actually work together. You get to love your life as an actor, singer, or dancer, even including auditions. And if that sounds amazing, come join us inside of Momentum. You get lifetime access to The Performers Plan, coaching, community, and more. And I will be supporting you the entire way. Go to Kelliyoungmanwellness.com/momentum to join us now.